Lustful Fantasies to Sinful Disasters
by loverofakatsuki
Summary: What happens when the Akatsuki, including Olivia and Lexy, have a magical adventure within the realms of Disney's fantasies caused by a jutsu. Rated M: lemon,yaoi,yuri,language,violence...and for the ones that are forced to singalong lol! Cast:OC,lexy,kaku,hida,tobi,zets,saso,dei,kisa,itac,mada
1. Chapter 1

It happened so very sudden.

No one could stop it but they were sucked into a warp hole, plunging the entire Akatsuki including Olivia and Lexy into different worlds…but where?

* * *

*Itachi groaned and rubbed his aching head, sitting up and glancing at his whereabouts. He was in a bleak large cave and was trapped to boot.

He grumbled as he stood up then cocked a brow at his garments. The raven was wearing baggy white pant with a brown waistband with no shoes and a purple vest?

He scratched his head to why he would be wearing something this silly. He shook it off and focused on more important things. Where am I?

A floating carpet came out of nowhere, flying towards him and slightly rubbing against his leg. He smirked a little and gave it a small pat; it seemed friendly.

"I'm going to kill whoever did this ridiculous justu." He didn't know who did it but he had a feeling it was Tobi.

He made some hand signs to do an escape jutsu but it didn't work. "Huh?" He tried again but nothing.

He sighed heavily, "Great, I can't use my chakra. Now what?" He wandered and plopped on a rock when he noticed an old antique lamp lying next to his feet.

Itachi picked it up muttering, "Makes me think of that fairytale with the Arabian boy finding the genie's lamp. Oh well, no harm in trying."

He rubbed the side and it actually started to glow and bounce around the place before a huge amount of smoke came flowing out.

* * *

*Zetsu was staring at nothing in particular gloomily, trying to figure out why he was dressed in some bandit's outfit with a bow and arrow.

He watched an elegant carriage roll by as some guy called Little John telling him now was their chance to rob the cruel princes gold. _Why isn't Kakuzu here instead of me? __**He would do it no questions asked!**_

He sighed and rubbed his head, planning on killing whoever did this jutsu and hoping to unit with the others….where ever they were.

* * *

*Hidan was smirking evilly at the crew and shouted, "I SAID PUT YOUR FUCKING BACKS INTO IT YOU FUCKERS! LOAD THAT FUCKING CANNON SO I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP!"

The priest was adorned in a pirate's suit and apparently was the captain of the ship. He didn't mind it actually since the crew was too afraid of him to talk back and he had beer and treasure to boot.

_Kakuzu would be so fucking jealous of me right now._

The jashinist found out right quick he couldn't use his jutsu but it didn't matter, he kicked a guy's ass without even trying.

He growled with frustration actually having an idea where he was at, "Some fucking place called Neverland I think." He remembered Olivia and Tobi watching the movie not too long ago but, how in FUCK did he get here.

It seems real but it's not supposed to be. An illusion?

"I better fucking find one of the others so they can fucking tell me what the fuck all this means!"

* * *

* Why she couldn't control herself from singing she didn't know but…...Lexy was having a ball!

_It'll do magic believe it or not__  
__bibbidi-bobbidi-boo__  
__Salagadoola means mechicka booleroo__  
__But the thingmabob that does the job is__  
__bibbidi-bobbidi-boo__  
__Salagadoola menchicka boola bibbidi-bobbidi-boo__  
__Put 'em together and what have you got__  
__bibbidi-bobbidi bibbidi-bobbidi bibbidi-bobbidi-boo_

Waving her wand on Cinderella and giving her a beautiful gown, wishing her the best and when to be back before waving good bye.

Once she was gone the teen squealed.

"This IS a dream come true! I'm a fairy godmother that can sing bitches!"

She hopped around all happy but frowned a little at the garden, "I miss Olivia, she needs to see this but where is she or everybody else at?"

She slumped on the garden bench, "I wish I was where she's at."

The teen went wide eyed as her wand activated on its own and muttered, "Fuck."

* * *

*Kisame found his quarters quite nice, loaded with comfy pillows and jewels but….he couldn't get out. He was wearing some baggy pants with a waist band but other than that…he had no clue what happened and wanted to find one of the others.

Nothing made sense. He couldn't use his chakra, his strength couldn't damage these walls so just sat there gloomy until something weird happened.

It was like a huge force of wind was sucking him to one side of the room and couldn't do a thing as he was taken.

He blinked a few times once the spinning was over and didn't open them until, "Kisame?" His eyes shot open and saw his lover staring up at him with his mouth parted cutely.

"Itachi!" He flung himself on him, "I'm glad you're here Kisame, but why were you in the lamp?"

The shark glanced down and stared at his smoky form from the waist down. "I'm a genie? What the hell?" Itachi sighed, "Whatever is going on it's like those cartoons Olivia, Lexy, and Tobi watch."

Kisame grunted, "Well at least I'm not some form of fish or something stupid!"

All of a sudden the unexpected happened, Kisame started…singing?! Without his own free will!

_Well Ali Baba had them forty thieves__  
__Scheherezad-ie had a thousand tales__  
__But master you in luck 'cause up your sleeves__  
__You got a brand of magic never fails_

_You got some power in your corner now__  
__Some heavy ammunition in your camp__  
__You got some punch, pizzazz, yahoo and how__  
__See all you gotta do is rub that lamp__  
__And I'll say_

* * *

Itachi was in shock what was happening with the magic, music, and his lover singing the song just like on the movie but just played along to avoid any issues.

He found it quite….fun in a way.  
_  
__Mister Aladdin, sir__  
__What will your pleasure be?__  
__Let me take your order__  
__Jot it down__  
__You ain't never had a friend like me__  
__No no no__Life is your restaurant__  
__And I'm your maitre d'__  
__C'mon whisper what it is you want__  
__You ain't never had a friend like me__Yes sir, we pride ourselves on service__  
__You're the boss__  
__The king, the shah__  
__Say what you wish__  
__It's yours! True dish__  
__How about a little more Baklava?__Have some of column "A"__  
__Try all of column "B"__  
__I'm in the mood to help you dude__  
__You ain't never had a friend like me__Can your friends do this?__  
__Do your friends do that?__  
__Do your friends pull this out their little hat?__  
__Can your friends go, poof?__  
__Well, looky here__  
__Can your friends go, Abracadabra, let 'er rip__  
__And then make the sucker disappear?__So doncha sit there slack jawed, buggy eyed__  
__I'm here to answer all your midday prayers__  
__You got me bona fide, certified__  
__You got a genie for your chare d'affaires__  
__I got a powerful urge to help you out_

_So what-cha wish? I really wanna know__  
__You got a list that's three miles long, no doubt__  
__Well, all you gotta do is rub like so - and oh__Mister Aladdin, sir, have a wish or two or three__  
__I'm on the job, you big nabob__  
__You ain't never had a friend, never had a friend__  
__You ain't never had a friend, never had a friend__  
__You ain't never had a friend like me~__  
__You ain't never had a friend like me, hah!_

Itaci clapped smirking at his lover once he was done. Kisame looked petrified to what just happened, gasping for breath, "WHAT THE HELL?"

His lover murmured, "You sang quite well Kisame. It's like you've been fully trained to sing." "But I, I didn't do anything. It just came out!"

The raven smiled, "It's alright. It's probably a part of the jutsu so let's just focus on getting out and uniting with the others." "How?"

Itachi stood up, "I wish we can find at least one of the others."

Kisame went wide eyed, gaining a surge of power and clapping his hands. He made a face and mocked, "Your wish is my command my lover."

Itachi chuckled as his lover got on the magic carpet with him, shooting out of the cave at full speed.

**To be continued: **

**WEIRD change of plot isn't it? XD**


	2. Chapter 2

*Deidara found himself fighting a huge dragon, running to the side after jumping over a patch of thorns then quickly shielding himself from the green flames with his shield.

_I have to admit, fighting with a sword with no jutsu is a bang un! _He was cornered by the beast before he hastily climbed up the rocky cliff to avoid the flames that kept catching fire to all the damn thorns.

That pink fairy he saw did something to his sword declaring, "Thou sword of truth, fly swift and sure, that evil die and good endure!"

Deidara threw the sword as it struck the dragon's heart, making it shriek a dying cry before falling off the cliff.

He panted and muttered, "I can't wait to tell Danna I slain a dragon un!"

He then gawked as some oval portal opening appeared. The artisan glanced around and shrugged before walking into it.

* * *

*She was beyond freaked out as she watched Judge Claude Frollo put the flame to the bails of hay at her feet. Olivia already knew what was happening and where she was but this was NOT good.

The flames grew rapidly and she coughed harshly from the smoke, praying for someone to save her….though she knew the bell ringer would come but she was mistaken.

"YARGGH UN!" Deidara leapt onto the platform and cut her loose before flinging her over his shoulder and running away from the crowd and guards.

Once in a private spot she hugged his neck, "Deidara you saved me! I'm so happy to see you!" He hugged her back with a smirk, "I'm glad I got here in time but why were they trying to burn you at the stake un?" "Didn't you ever watch the Hunchback of Notre Dame?"

"No un." I shook my head, "To put it simply I'm a gypsy girl, which wasn't a good thing in these times, that some priest had the hots for but refused him so now he's going to send me to the depths of hell."

Deidara just gawked, "Seriously? I need to watch that un."

She smiled, "It's a very good movie but I have to admit, you look handsome. Where did you wind up?" "I think Sleeping Beauty since I was battling a dragon un."

"Cool but, hey….what's that?" Another portal sprang up, "Hey, I just came through that un!" She pondered, "Did it just pop up like this before?"

He nodded, "I just defeated the dragon when it did un." "There might be a pattern. Maybe once you conquer or complete something you get to go somewhere else."

"You might have a point since I just saved you, so let's go un."

She took his hand and they both left into it.

* * *

* _One Song_

_I have but one song _

_One song _

_Only for you_

_One heart_

_Tenderly beating_

_Ever entreating_

_Constant and true~_

_One love_

_That has possessed me_

_One love_

_Thrilling me through_

_One song_

_My heart keeps singing_

_Of one love_

_Only for you~_

Tobi giggled when the dove kissed him and watch the princess go behind the curtain smiling at him.

"TOBI!" He whipped around and grinned, "OLIVEE!" He twirled her around when she leapt on him, wearing some gypsy outfit before asking, "Can Olivee believe Tobi is a prince? His wish came true!"

She pouted, "The same can't be said for me. I wanted to be a princess." Deidara scowled, "What are you two talking about? Do you something about this un?" "Uh, well sempai it's ah…..hard to explain."

"AGHHHHHH! SOMEBODY CATCH ME!" They looked up to see someone falling down and Tobi jumped up to catch the person, landing back down gracefully.

Olivia smiled, "LEXY!" The teen went wide eyed and hugged Tobi, then attacked her crush, "MY WISH CAME TRUE!"

"WILL YOU THREE EXPLAIN TO ME WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON UN!"

Olivia patted his back, "Calm down Dei, we can explain." Lexy fiddled with her hair, "Do we have to?" Tobi smirked, "Yes we do Loo Loo, sempai needs to know."

Lexy muttered, "We just tried a little harmless jutsu from that book Zetsu had." Deidara groaned, "Tobi, you knew that book was off limits so why did you take it! Have you forgotten that's how the whole vampire incident happened un!"

The boy hug his head, "Tobi didn't take it...Loo Loo did." Olivia and Deidara stared at her, "What? I can be sneaky if I want to."

Tobi sniffed, "Tobi just wanted to be a prince sempai and we all wanted to be in a fairy tale. Tobi didn't meant to drag everyone else in too."

Lexy patted his back and hugged him.

Olivia smiled at Deidara, "It'll wear off just like that other one did. Just enjoy yourself and let's find the others."

The blonde mumbled, "I guess but…uh….Lexy un?" "Yeah?" "Who are you supposed to be?" She snorted, "The fairy godmother ain't it fucking obvious?"

Olivia giggled, "It's hard to tell since the dress is fitted." "Look who's talking with her perky breasts poking up like that." She blushed with a smirk until Tobi pointed, "Oooh, look."

Lexy tilted her head, "What is it?" "Another portal, come on let's go un."

* * *

*Madara sat in his throne, VERY confused but caught on to the jutsu's details. It was just like when Tobi turned himself into a vampire.

"Well, at least I'm a king and not something silly." He was decked out in royal robes, taking off the ridiculous crown that weighed a ton.

He impatiently tapped his fingers on the armrest thinking. _I wonder if I can find the others. I just became king after I pulled the sword out of the stone so…..something should happen._

A bright light distracted him and he saw it was a portal. "Looks like someone is reading my mind." He went through it and winded up…..uh…..on a ship?

"What the fuck? Madara?" The elder smirked at Hidan's getup as a pirate and murmured, "Nice outfit." "At least I'm not fucking wearing some stupid fluffy robe."

* * *

"Whatever, where am I?" "Some island where kids never grow up." Madara chuckled, "You're in the right place Hidan." "Fuck off!"

The pirate Smee came running up to him panting, "Captain! Captain!" "What the fuck do you want?" The lacky flinched and blurted out, "Pan is coming!"

Hidan scowled, "Fine, just fucking shoot him down." "Aye aye sir!" Madara rolled his eyes and covered his ears from the ear splitting cannon shots; it's a wonder why pirates didn't go deaf.

The flying nuisance dodged them easily, flying at top speed until he landed on the helm sulking, "Care to explain why you were trying to shoot me down Hidan?"

The priest shouted, "Sasori? You're the Pan?"

The puppet master didn't look too thrilled and mutterd, glaring at the pirates trying to surround him and they backed off, "Apparently so and unfortunately I recall this jutsu. Just wait until I find out who's responsible...though I don't mind the flying."

Madara and Hidan went to him, "I have an idea which ones are responsible but for now, we all need to find the others." Sasori sighed, "Right and what's up with the robe?" "I'm King Arthur."

The red head snorted, "And I'm Peter Pan but that doesn't make it so. Hidan and I are not mortal enemies."

Madara glared, "Watch how you mock me Sasori." Hidan stomped his foot, "Both of you fucking knock it off and let's go through that hole!"

"Hole?"

Sasori looked, "Looks more like a portal to me."

"Whatever, let's fucking go! I'm getting fucking tired on this ship."

* * *

*Kisame pointed at the ground, "Hey I can see Lexy!" "Let's go." They glided down and landed near them, Lexy attacking Kisame with a hug and groping his chest and behind.

"Hey! Don't start something you can't finish." "Oh I can finish sharky boy!" Itachi fixed his death glare at a certain someone, "Tobi."

The boy hid behind Olivia, "Don't hurt Tobi." Itachi advanced towards him but Deidara and Olivia stopped him.

"I know you're pissed about what's going on but let's forget that for now ok." "We need to find the others un."

"OLIVIA!" She turned and was attacked by her lover, "It's about fucking time I found you." "Hidan you're a pirate? Sexy."

Lexy kept ogling Kisame, "This is sexy too." The shark grinned and was about to pinch her breasts but seeing Madara watching him he didn't dare.

"Lexy." "Uncle Madara!" She flung herself on him smiling, "I'm the fairy godmother! Isn't that fucking awesome?" He patted her head, "If you say so and you look cute. You too Olivia."

She smirked at him, "Thanks."

* * *

Hidan frowned, "Where's Kakuzu?" "Tobi don't see his Zetsu." "We haven't seen them yet." Itachi pointed at Lexy, Olivia, and Tobi. "You three know more about these movies so where are we?"

They were slap dab in the middle of a jungle with loads of vines hanging from the trees. Lexy folded her arms, "Tarzan?"

A rustling was heard overhead and they all looked to see someone come out on a low tree limb.

It was Kakuzu and he grumbled, "Don't say a word."

Olivia, Lexy, and Hidan gawked and had instant nosebleeds from seeing him.

He more or less was completey naked aside from a loin cloth covering his front and behind, his entire stitched, masculine body exposed.

Olivia was aroused like no tomorrow, "Get down here and take me now Kuzu!" "NO TAKE ME!"

Madara smacked his adopted niece on the back of the head, "You're not getting with him." "No fair!"

Hidan wiped his nose with his cuff sleeve, "Swing down those fucking vines so we can fucking rape you!" Kakuzu smirked at his little fan club mocking, "Who needs vines when I have these?"

He used his threads to attach to a limb, swinging down in all his sexy glory to the others. Sasori frowned, "How come you can use your threads when we can't use our chakra?"

He shrugged, "I can't use mine either. The only thing I can do with the threads is to get from limb to limb."

While the others began discussing about what to do now... quarreling mostly...some people were just too horny for their own good.

Olivia and Hidan attacked the stitched Tarzan whilst Lexy sneaked Kisame around the trees.

**To be continued…get ready for smut in next chapter. lol**

**Tobi's song title: 'One song' from Snow White**


	3. Chapter 3

Kakuzu tried to fight his lovers off and growled, "We have more important things to consider here!" Hidan snorted, "Sex comes first!" Olivia nodded, "Especially right now!"

The miser sighed, "Normally I wouldn't turn you two down but this is not the time." Olivia huffed and walked off with Hidan glaring at him, "Now look what you fucking did but I don't give a fuck about you say!"

"Since when do you ever?" Hidan pouted and rubbed the bulge through the loin cloth. "Hmmm, you're getting hard so that fucking means you want it." "You're rubbing it so why wouldn't I get hard?"

He went to his knees and whipped it out, "I'll show you!" He popped it into his mouth, sucking harshly as the stitched wild man groaned and tried to push him off, "Damn it Hidan!"

Kakuzu would love to screw his lovers both senseless but now is not the time or place to be doing this.

Hidan nipped the head before going all the way down, deep throating him with ease; now the miser couldn't get away even if he wanted to.

* * *

*Lexy was on top of Kisame, heavily making out with him as he lifted up her dress, squeezing her behind to make her yelp.

He was about to flip their positions when someone came out of the brush. Kisame cocked a brow at Olivia's flushed and gloomy expression. "What's wrong?"

She blushed a little, glancing at the ground as she murmured, "Kakuzu won't have sex with us so…..can I…..join you two?" Lexy went wide eyed, barely able to restrain herself from shouting, "Hell yes!"

Kisame shushed her, "If you don't keep quiet Madara will stop us." "I'm sorry but I'm excited." Olivia went over, instantly being pulled down and straddled by the teen that attacked her mouth fiercely.

The shark chuckled and was about to fondle them both when he had an idea. _If I'm a genie, then that means I can do all sorts of magic. _He focused his powers like he would his chakra and made his creation….yes….a clone.

He pulled Lexy away from the women, making her growl in the process as the clone Kisame placed Olivia on his chest, with her back against his. Then Lexy was allowed to go back to her crush, hiking up the woman's dress and stripping her panties off before doing the same to herself.

She then grinded her body against the woman's, trying to keep her growls low but an uncontrolled moan came out when Kisame entered her. Olivia did the same when the clone followed suit, both Kisame's thrusting in and out wildly.

The pounding from the sharks were making the girls bodies rub together in all the right places, sending waves of pleasure for them both. To keep them quiet Lexy devoured Olivia's mouth, shoving her tongue to play with the other in a heated kiss.

Kisame was grinning up a storm and couldn't help but gloat. _Not only once, but twice I get to fuck them at the same time. I'm a lucky man!_

* * *

*Kakuzu was on the verge, growling in the process until Hidan played with his sack and made him release into his lover's mouth. The pirate greedily drank it all, suckling on the length until he stood up smirking naughtily.

"Feel better?" "Yes." "Well I fucking don't, suck me off like a good wild man!" Kakuzu chuckled and roughly pinned his lover against the tree, "Oh I will. It wouldn't be fair if I didn't now would it?" "Fuck no."

Now it was Hidan's turn for his release.

*Deidara was happily bragging to Sasori at this point, telling him about his battle with a dragon. "I only had a sword and sheath to fight but I killed it. It really was a bang Danna un!"

His lover smirked, "I wish I could've seen it." Tobi was fiddling with Zetsu's bow and arrow (who just wandered up lost), "Tobi got to sing to a princess and he sounded good too!" **"I knew you could sing so that's not a surprise." **

Itachi chuckled, "You should have seen Kisame singing." Madara went wide eyed, "He can sing?" "Something happened and he began to sing, unable to control himself. He sounded great, it was like he'd been trained by a professional."

Sasori sighed, "Great, now we have to worry about breaking into song." Tobi giggled, "Tobi liked it, he was romantic!" His lover stroked his hair, "Yes you are."

Madara looked around and muttered, "Where's Lexy?" **"With Kisame." **He gawked, "Oh hell no!"

He stomped off into the jungle, having a hunch what the shark was doing to her.

* * *

*Both girls screamed out their orgasms in each other's mouths as the men growled in content. It took a few minutes before any wanted to move but they managed.

Kisame's clone disappeared and conjured up some cloth's to clean themselves with. "There you are!"

Madara came out of the brush fairly pissed, "I'm going to ki…..well, nevermind." Lexy was too busy focused on groping Olivia, with the woman trying to push her off since she didn't want anymore but the teen was persistent.

Pinning her against the tree she locked lips with her again, squeezing her breasts until Madara tapped her on the shoulder, "Mind if I cut in?"

Lexy leaped back and stuttered, "I did do nothing fucking wrong!" He chuckled, "I didn't say you did but where's my love?" He glanced at Olivia and she blushed, backing away slowly, "I'm spent so…..yeah."

Kisame was already raring for another go from that small yuri scene but, it'd be better not to at the moment.

* * *

*Hidan fisted his lover's hair, groaning with pleasure, "That's it, just a fucking…..little more!" He tried to buck his hips into his lover's mouth but they were held in place by the miser's strong hands until he came.

He whimpered when it was over, Kakuzu giving him a chaste kiss before muttering, "Come on, let's go."

They regrouped with the others, who were laughing at Lexy and Olivia. "What the fuck is so funny?" Sasori grinned, "These two were making out according to Madara."

Kakuzu gave his lover a vague expression, "Really? You left me to get attention from her?" Lexy giggled, "Of course she did!" "Go find some other mouse to toy with."

The teen was about to snap at him when Madara covered her mouth, "There's another portal." Sure enough there it was so they all went through.

Deidara looked around, "We were just here un." Zetsu shook his head, "No it's different in a way." **"It's more humid."**

Hidan snorted, "Alright you three, where the fuck are we?" Olivia mumbled, "The jungle book I think." Lexy cupped her ear, "What's that music?"

They all listened quietly until Olivia and Tobi squealed in delight, running off towards it with the rest chasing after them. "COME BACK HERE YOU TWO!"

They skidded to a halt, observing the scene of a bunch of monkeys and a boy dance to a song. Lexy bobbed her head along it, "I love this song!"

Kakuzu and Zetsu both face palmed, "Agh, they are NOT dancing with them!" Lexy and Kisame keeled over laughing at Tobi and Olivia dancing to the 'I wanna be Like You' song, Madara stopping her from joining in though.

* * *

Once it was over, the ruckus started and the ruins were about to collapse with Olivia and Tobi trying to make their way back.

Hidan and Deidara ran down, bringing them back with scowls. "You could have been killed Tobi un!" "Don't you ever fucking wander off again!"

The ones in trouble nodded gloomily until the boy sneaked off without them noticing. They were quarrelling again and he didn't want to hear it.

Olivia grew agitated that some of the guys were taking this jutsu so badly and sighed looking over at Tobi…but he wasn't there.

"Tobi?" She saw his tracks and followed them, wondering where he went off to. Once in a clearing she panicked seeing Kaa the python trying to hypnotize him.

The serpent turned to her as she grabbed a decent sized stick and chuckled, "Wellllll lookssssssss like I'll have a little ssssssnack for later."

"AGHHHHHHHHH!" Olivia freaked out when Kaa tried to wrap her in his coils and put her under his spell, hitting him for all it's worth screaming, "YOU LEAVE MY TOBI ALONE!"

* * *

*The others heard her cry of distress, running at full speed. Hidan got there first but just gawked. Kakuzu went wide eyed as everyone else from what they saw.

Olivia beating a giant python with a stick like no tomorrow they couldn't help but watch for a few minutes.

Then, Zetsu noticed Tobi was in trouble, he rushed over and got him out of the coils, gently slapping his cheeks to snap him out of it. "Ze…Zetsu?" "Thank goodness."

Right when she was about to swing again Kakuzu grabbed the opposing end and held her against his chest. "That's enough, he's not going to bother you anymore."

He tried to take the stick away but she had an iron grip on the thing and wouldn't let up. Lexy got worried, "Is she ok?"

Kakuzu grumbled, "She hates snakes." Sasori frowned, "She's about to hyperventilate and we don't have any medical supplies. Calm her down and quick."

Hidan tried to help but Kisame held him back murmuring, "Let Kakuzu do it Hidan, he knows how to handle her." The priest snorted but nodded; he knew it was true.

Zetsu held his lover to him, stroking his hair and softly lecturing about wandering off. Kakuzu held her firmly against his chest, cooing to her, "Take deep breaths and focus on me."

* * *

Her face was flushed and breathing was rapid, so he had no choice but to do the usual. Glancing at the others he whispered softly, making dead sure no one would hear except her, "Kuzu wants his baby to relax for him; doesn't she want him to make her feel all better?"

Olivia leaned back, finally letting go of the stick. He held her hand and continued, "Kuzu will give his angel something special if she calms down."

Her breathing slowed down and a small whimper came out muttering, "Ka…kuzu." He nuzzled her neck and kissed it, "Kuzu loves his angel." "I love you too."

Her whisper was barely audible and slowly shifted, "Kuzu." He picked her up and held her like a baby with her arms around his neck, burying her face into his hair.

Madara and Lexy were astounded, "What did you say to her?" "None of your business." Hidan patted Lexy on the head, "It's just something he fucking does to calm her down and it works every fucking time! I have YET to find out what he says to her."

The teen pouted and muttered, "I want to know!" Tobi giggled, "Olivee won't tell you either, Tobi tried."

Itachi grabbed Kisame's arm, "What was that?" Sasori felt it too, "The ground is shaking off in a distance."

The trembles grew more rapid as they tried to make a run for it. The earth quaking terribly until the entire surface gave way…everyone falling down into yet another portal.

Now what's going to happen?

**TBC: XD**


	4. Chapter 4

*Olivia groaned and rubbed her head, she was being held by Kakuzu when all of a sudden she was pulled away from him during the earthquake.

Her nerves were still bad and hadn't completely calmed down yet. "Where am I?" She was…..underwater?

The woman stared down at herself to see a fish tail and seashells covering her breasts. She smiled a little, "I'm a mermaid."

Swimming around, getting the feel of it she was rather enjoying herself until she noticed where she was at….the sunken ship.

A shadow came up behind her as she slowly turned, her heart rate sky rocketing as a HUGE shark opened its jaws on the other side of the glass.

She gasped and swam as fast as she could when it attacked, chasing her all over the ship until she managed to get out. It followed her relentlessly and she kept swimming until she couldn't anymore.

Trying to get her breath back the beast came flying at her, Olivia crying out in fear and thought she was done for until something grabbed her in the nick of time, the shark getting its head stuck into the metal ring on the ocean floor.

"Are you ok?" She looked up with tearful eyes to see Madara and sobbed into his chest.

He was a merman in general and saw her swimming for her life so naturally he had to help. But he was very concerned; she was completely terrified by the attack and was on the verge of hyperventilating again.

_What do I do? Kakuzu isn't here to calm her. _

The only thing he could think of was to take action. She didn't resist as he gave her a long passionate kisses, trying to get her to focus on that instead.

_It's actually working...damn I'm good._

She began to relax and seemed to be getting better. Pulling back he whispered, "Are you alright?"

Olivia nodded and wiped the tears away as Madara took her hand, "I see another portal so let's try to regroup again."

"Ok, thanks Madara."

They took their time swimming towards the portal, hoping it would lead somewhere better.

* * *

*Hidan and Kakuzu were bickering in the dining hall. "Shock? My Philip a shock? What's wrong with my Philip?"

Hidan backed Kakuzu around the table with the miser trying to reason with him, "Nothing Hidan, I only meant…" "Why doesn't your daughter like my son? I'm not sure that my son would like your daughter!"

He jutted his chest against the misers and pissed him off, "Now see here…." Hidan snapped, "I'm not so sure my grandchildren want YOU as their grandfather!"

Kakuzu snorted and fixed his crown, "Why you, you, unreasonable, pompous, blustering old windbag!" Hidan gasped and reached around on the table muttering, "Unreason, fucking pomp, En garde, sir!"

He reaches for the sword but grabs the fish by mistake, threatening to kill Kakuzu with it. The miser growled, "I warn you Hidan, this means war!"

Hidan attacked with the fish as Kakuzu shielded it with a platter dish. The priest declaring, "Forward! For honor! For country! For…"

The priest realizes he's fighting with a fish and points at it laughing, Kakuzu joining in as they both howled with laughter. "What's all this fucking about anyway?" "Nothing Hidan, absolutely nothing!"

They heard an announcement of the prince coming and Hidan cried out in delight, running off to meet his son.

Kakuzu stood there dumbstruck to what just happened. "I don't have a daughter! Great, now we have to deal with this too. I wonder how long it'll take Hidan to notice."

He went to the balcony and observed Hidan with a smirk to see what happens.

Hidan was furious, "Nowadays I'm still the fucking king! And I command you to come to your senses!" The prince mounted his horse, "And marry the girl I love."

"Exactly!" The prince rode off smiling, "Goodbye father."

"Goodbye father! Marry the girl you….no….what the fuck just happened?"

He gawked at the prince and then heard laughing from above. Kakuzu was actually doubled over chuckling up a storm. "Yo….You're such an idiot Hidan!"

His lover blushed, "SHUT UP! I got caught in the fucking moment."

* * *

*Sasori was bowing to the assembly. Suddenly, he stops. He looks up. For lo... there he stands.

The man of his dreams. Who he is or whence he came, he knows not, nor does he care, for his heart tells him that here, here is the youth predestined to be his bride.

He ran towards the beautiful blonde, asking him to dance as he approached. They waltzed in bliss, gazing at each other with shear love in each other's eyes.

_So this is love, Mmmmmm__  
__So this is love__  
__So this is what makes life divine__  
__I'm all aglow, Mmmmmm__  
__And now I know__  
__The key to all heaven is mine__  
__My heart has wings, Mmmmmm__  
__And I can fly__  
__I'll touch ev'ry star in the sky__  
__So this is the miracle that I've been dreaming of__  
__Mmmmmm__  
__Mmmmmm__  
__So this is love_

They were about to kiss when the clock struck twelve and Deidara gasped, "It's midnight." "Yes, so it is. But wh…"

He tried to leave, "Goodbye." Sasori held his hand to stop him, "No, no wait…..what the..." Deidara blinked a few times and mumbled, "Looks like that portal separated us again and now we're role playing un."

Sasori gazed at his lover and growled, "You're so damn beautiful." The blonde blushed like crazy, "D..Danna~ don't say that un."

He pulled his brat closer, "Why not? It's true and I'm not letting you leave just because it's midnight." Deidara grinned and wrapped his arms around his lover's neck, "I love you un." "I love you too Dei."

Kissing each other lovingly they figured this place wasn't so bad after all.

* * *

*So beautiful, even in death, that the dwarfs could not find it in their hearts to bury him….

They fashioned a coffin of glass and gold, and kept eternal vigil at his side...…the prince, who had searched far and wide, heard of the beauty that slept in the glass coffin...

_One Song_

_I have but one song _

_One song _

_Only for you_

_One song_

_My heart keeps singing_

_Of one love_

_Only for you~_

Kisame approached the coffin, leaning down and kissed the sleeping raven, kneeling on the ground afterwards to show his respects for his death as did the dwarfs.

Within moments, the long dark eyelashes lifted and he woke up. It was a miracle. Itachi sat up looking around until his eyes met Kisame's, reaching out to him lovingly as the prince lifted him into his arms.

It was joyful moment to be sure, Kisame lifting his lover onto the horse and walking along side it with Itachi smiling at him. "This is rather silly isn't it?"

His lover shrugged, "I suppose but let's enjoy it."

Both of them actually enjoying the music that chorused throughout the scene with smiles.

_Some day my prince will come__  
__Some day we'll meet again__  
__And away to his castle we'll go__  
__To be happy forever I know__Some day when spring is here__  
__We'll find our love anew__  
__And the birds will sing__  
__And wedding bells will ring__  
__Some day when my dreams come true~_

* * *

*Lexy sighed: I can see what's happening?

Pumbaa: What?

Lexy: And they don't have a clue?

Pumbaa: Who?

Lexy: They'll fall in love and here's the bottom line  
Our trio's down to two.

Pumbaa: Oh.

Lexy: Ze sweet caress of twilight. There's magic everywhere. And with all this romantic atmosphere. Disaster's in the air~

*Tobi and Zetsu wandered through the oasis, running around holding hands and enjoying themselves to the fullest.

_Can you feel the love tonight?_  
_The peace the evening brings_  
_The world, for once, in perfect harmony_  
_With all its living things_

_Zetsu: So many things to tell him. __But how to make him see? The truth about my past? Impossible! He'd turn away from me_

_Tobi: He's holding back, he's hiding._ _But what, I can't decide_. _Why won't he be the king I know he is_. _The king I see inside?_

_[Chorus:]_  
_Can you feel the love tonight?_  
_The peace the evening brings_  
_The world, for once, in perfect harmony_  
_With all its living things_  
_Can you feel the love tonight?_  
_You needn't look too far_  
_Stealing through the night's uncertainties_  
_Love is where they are~_

The two lovers kiss and embraced each other lovingly.

Lexy got all teary and sniffed: And if he falls in love tonight. It can be assumed~

Pumbaa: His carefree days with us are history

Lexy and Pumbaa: In short, our pal is doomed.

WAHHHHH!

**TBC: How I made this chapter so lovey dovey except for the beginning I have no clue. **

**But it's lovely…..to me anyway lol :3**


	5. Chapter 5

"Is Loo-Loo ok?" The teen sniffed and wiped her eyes, "You and Zetsu frolicking through the oasis all lovey dovey. It was SO freaking beautiful!"

The bipolar man blushed and muttered, **"Don't go spreading it around." **"I found it rather touching myself." **"You would!" **

"LEXY!" The teen fell through the ground in yet another portal whilst Zetsu jerked Tobi to him to keep him close as they to plummeted downwards.

*Sasori sat there with a glum expression muttering, "I'm getting tired of these damn portals popping up all the time!"

"You're not the only one, hey! Get the fuck off me Tobi!" The boy was sitting on Hidan's arm, trying to crawl his way out of the Akatsuki member pile.

Once again they were back in their previous outfits but in a different location. Kisame helped Itachi up and looked around, "Looks like the inside of a castle."

"I'd like to know why we keep being transported all over the place un." Kakuzu glanced around, "Where's Olivia?" Madara frowned, "Lexy isn't here either!"

Hidan groaned, "NOW WHAT!?" Sasori shushed them, "Hey, do you hear that?" Itachi leaned his head to the nearest door, "Someone's in there."

Zetsu was the one who opened the door and they all gasped, except Madara who shouted, "LEXY!"

* * *

She was wearing a long blue dress, following a glowing green orb through the fireplace up a secret staircase. Tobi and Kisame tried to stop her but the stone walls reappeared and they couldn't break through.

Deidara blurted out, "We have to stop her un!" Sasori shook his head, "I don't understand, it was like she was in a trance."

Tobi nodded his head frantically, "She was and if we don't get to Loo-Loo she'll prick her finger on the spinning wheel and fall into an eternal sleep!" "WHAT THE FUCK DO WE DO?"

Kisame focused his powers on the stone wall and actually succeeded to make it disappear once more. All running up the labyrinth of staircases, they finally saw Lexy at the very top of a stair case.

Her uncle yelled at her, "Lexy! Don't touch anything!" His voice rang throughout the tower but as they entered the room they were greeted by a sinister figure in black.

Kakuzu and Hidan were beyond shock. "O…Olivia?" Their lover ignored them and sneered, "You poor, simple fools. Thinking you could defeat me, ME, the mistress of all evil!"

She pulled back her cape to reveal the sleeping teen on the floor, "Well, here's your precious princess!"

Shrieking with malicious laughter Olivia disappeared in green flames, leaving the entire Akatsuki at a loss for words.

Tobi started crying and holding Lexy to him, "Poor Loo-Loo! Why did Olivee do that to her?"

Hidan gulped, "I have to admit she fucking scared the hell out of me."

* * *

Kakuzu grunted in agreement, "She was rather….evil. Now we know she has a more sinister dark side than we thought possible." "No joke un."

Itachi cleared his throat and knelt beside Tobi, "Come on, let's take her somewhere else." **"Too late, there's another portal." **

Once again, they went through it and came to the other tower where the sleeping beauty was to be placed at.

Gently laying her across the bed, placing a rose in her hand Madara grew depressed. "She's done for."

Itachi glanced at him, "What do you mean?"

"Where in hell are we going to find her one true love to kiss her and break the spell? That's how it goes right?"

Tobi nodded with a sniff, "Yes but, what about Olivee? She's turned evil now." Kakuzu shook his head, "I don't know but…..wait a damn minute!"

All eyes turned to the furious miser, who glared at Deidara and Tobi. "I just realized something."

The accused sweat dropped. "This whole jutsu more or less does whatever the user wants it to do and since all four of you got involved, these certain events are happening because you're thinking about it."

Hidan grinned, "So that fucking means Olivia secretly wanted to be a villain." Sasori face palmed, "And Lexy must've wanted to be the one to be awakened by her true love's kiss. So childish."

Itachi smirked, "So it seems but, I quite enjoyed it myself." Tobi clapped his hands, "What story were you in Itachi?"

The raven blushed, "Snow White." Madara smirked, "That role actually suits you very well. At any rate, maybe if you two focus on getting Olivia here she'll come."

Deidara shrugged, "That could be a possibility, ready to give it a shot Tobi un?" "Ready sempai!"

They both closed their eyes, desiring for their friend to come to them when a portal showed up.

* * *

Olivia came out dancing in a sexy red dress, humming away happily as Hidan covered his nose bleed. She stopped once she saw everyone's amused stares at her, "Uh….you didn't see that."

Sasori licked his lips, "Oh we did. I wasn't aware you could dance like that."

The woman turned red as Tobi hugged her, "Olivee still a gypsy but she was a bad girl." "Hmm?" "You were the evil Maleficent!"

Olivia blushed and muttered, "I always wanted to be an evil villain at least once. Did I do a good job?" Deidara laughed, "That's an understatement. You left us all dumbstruck un!"

Kakuzu growled, "I found it sexy."

Kisame nodded and pointed, "What do we do about Lexy? She won't wake up." Her friend went over and smiled, "Aww come on, are you guys really that blind?"

Apparently they were from the silent treatment.

"Has anyone even tried to kiss her yet?" Madara huffed, "Of course not!" "Well, someone has to or she won't ever wake up Madara."

The elder groaned, "Agh fine, but just a tiny peck on the lips and that's it!" Olivia pulled him back with a scowl, "Not you, it has to be her one true love."

"Who could that be pray tell?"

The woman face palmed, "You guys are such…..ugh….who in this room does she flirt, hug, grope, and give the most attention to? That should be a given!"

* * *

It was, all eyes went to Kisame who just blushed. "HELL NO! My niece is NOT in love with him!"

Olivia covered his mouth and motioned for the shark to come over. "We'll find out."

Kisame was nervous as he knelt on the bed, knowing all eyes were on him and curious to what was to happen.

Leaning down he gave the teen a small passionate kiss before rising back up to hear a snort, "That's not what I call a peck."

He rolled his eyes and sure enough, Lexy stirred on the bed and opened her eyes.

Deidara whistled, "Well I'll be un." "Looks like she fucking is in love with you fish."

The swordsman growled but mentally, he wasn't complaining. Itachi met his gaze with his lover and nodded in approval, so his lover must not mind the circumstance.

Lexy yawned and stretched, "Hey, what's going on? What did I miss?" Tobi giggled like crazy and leaped on Zetsu, "Loo-Loo was Sleeping Beauty and her prince woke her up."

"REALLY? That's fucking sweet….uh….uncle? Are you ok?"

Madara had sat on the floor with his head between his knees like he was going to be sick. Olivia was rubbing his back and smirking at Lexy. "What's eating him?"

**"The identity of your true love that broke the spell."**

Those chocolate orbs glanced at Kisame who just grinned at her. She blushed and hugged her knees giggling.

Kakuzu glanced over to the right, "Well as touching as this is, why is there another portal?"

Tobi blushed, "Tobi just want to do one thing right quick with Olivee and Loo-Loo."

Before anyone could protest he grabbed both the girls and jumped through the portal with them.

**TBC:**


	6. Chapter 6

"AGH! What is Tobi up to now? My fucking nerves can't take much more of this fucking jutsu!" Hidan slumped onto the bed as did Madara before another warp hole appeared. Sasori pinched the bridge of his nose before turning to his lover, "Brat~?"

The blonde went a little pink in the cheeks and shrugged, "I just want a change of scenery alright un." Hidan shot up mumbling, "No fucking complaints here."

Once through the mysterious portal, they found themselves in a strange land with very unusual creatures. **"Where in hell are we? Is that a…..rocking horse fly?"**

Huge flowers were overhead they heard singing in the distance as Itachi petted a small creature, "Hmm, bread butterflies." "Why did you bring us here Deidara?"

The blonde smirked, "This story has different perspectives on art that strikes my interest un." Following a red path it led them to a huge castle where they were approached by a cruel looking and rather large woman in red.

She turned up her nose and snorted, "Who are these people?" The small king ran to her side and inspected them, "I'm not sure my dear, they could be travelers. Though those two look like aces."

Referring to Itachi and Madara she nodded, "Maybe, but I DON'T LIKE TRESSPASSARS IN MY GARDEN! OFF WITH THEIR HEADS!"

Her thunderous yell surprised them all but it ticked a certain loud mouth off.

"I'D LIKE TO SEE YOU FUCKING CUT MY HEAD OFF! NO ONE FUCKING YELLS AT ME UNLESS THEY WANT TO FUCKING DIE!"

The jashinist's roar was much louder and fiercer than the queen's, so much she shrank back and didn't utter a sound.

* * *

The majority of the Akatsuki couldn't help but chuckle, even more so when another portal came up, music billowing out of it as a certain trio came dancing and singing out.

_All three: "Everybody, everybody, everybody wants to be a cat!"_

_Lexy: Halleujah!_

_All three: "Everybody, everybody, everybody wants to be a cat!"_

_Olivia: I'm telling you!_

_All three: "Everybody, everybody, everybody wants to be a cat!"_

_Tobi: Ye~ah!_

"**Are you three finished?" **They stopped and giggled, obviously having too much fun until they noticed where they were. "Alice in Wonderland eh?"

Madara sighed heavily, "Now that you three are back will you four send us home." Deidara was in agreement as was Tobi but the girls weren't too happy about it.

Kakuzu rested a hand on his lover's shoulder, "I know that face. What's wrong?" "I never got to be a princess yet." "If it'll make you happy just go ahead and do it before we all wind up killing each other."

She attacked him with a hug until Lexy pulled her away, whispering something into her ear. Olivia bit her lip and giggled, "Ooooh that's perfect but will it work? It's not Disney."

"It should, let's just try." Both girls smirking evilly at Tobi and Deidara they put their thoughts to the deed.

"Not again!"

*Tobi and Deidara were standing on a block of ice, both wearing suits that made them resemble penguins. "What the hell un?" "Looks like Olivee and Loo-Loo are getting us back for eating all their ice cream sempai."

"Damn, but what's going on here un?" "We going to sing, Tobi has feeling." "NO! I DON'T SING UN!"

The boy giggled, "Sempai and Tobi won't have no choice but to just like what happened to Kisame."

The blonde groaned and that's when the sing-a-long began.

* * *

_Tobi: Hey sempai, I guess it looks like we put our differences on ice! Get it huh? Put our differences on ice?_

_Deidara: I'd like to put you on ice un._

_Tobi: Look how we get along together. I think it's great the way we blend. You've tried to be as tough as leather, but now I see that's just pretend. _

_We'll find out way through stormy weather. Just you and me right to the end hey buddy, looks like we're two birds of a feather! And gee it looks like I got me a friend. Now you go._

_Take it sempai!_

_*the blonde ignores him until he's pulled back*_

_Tobi: Hey sempai! What do you call a flower before it opens?_

_Deidara: What un?_

_Tobi: What do you call a flower before it opens?_

_Deidara *scowls*: A bud._

_Tobi: I love it when you call me bud!_

_Deidara: Ughhhhh…._

_(Both in unison):_

_Tobi: Look how we get along together_

_Deidara: You are incredibly annoying un_

_Tobi: I think it's great the way we blend_

_Deidara: You're like a bone stuck in my throat_

_Tobi: You've tried to be as tough as leather_

_Deidara: This isn't something I'm enjoying_

_Tobi: But now I see that's just pretend_

_Deidara: I shoulda left you on that boat un_

_Tobi: We'll find out way through stormy weather_

_Deidara: You want a friend go find a snail un!_

_Tobi: Just you and me right to the end_

_Deidara: Or better yet a killer whale un!_

* * *

_Tobi: Hey buddy, looks like we're two birds of a feather_

_Deidara: Don't call me buddy un!_

_Tobi: And gee it looks like I got me a friend_

_Deidara: Nuh-uh! Not me un!_

_Tobi: Now you try! Take it sempai! Hey sempai, I caught you a herring, where should I put it?_

_Deidara: What un?_

_Tobi: I caught you a herring, where should I put it?_

_Deidara *holds out hand*: Put it there un_

_Tobi *grabs and shakes hand*: Put it there! Alright!_

_Deidara: Oh stop it un!_

_(Both in unison):_

_Deidara: When you're a rebel you're a rebel un_

_Tobi: You really like me just admit it_

_Deidara: You don't go finding friends to like un_

_Tobi: Alright, I'm gonna hold my breath_

_Deidara: Why don't you pack your blasted pebble un_

_Tobi: Quit it! Admit it!_

_Deidara: And take yourself a healthy hike un!_

_Tobi: But you know, you're gonna cause my death!_

_Deidara: That don't have penguins up in Juneau un_

_Tobi: It's getting dark….._

_Deidara: Why don't you go and start a trend un!_

_Tobi: G-g-g-goodbye sempai_

_*falls down*_

_Deidara: Oh knock it off. Hey, you're all blue!_

_*slaps his cheeks*_

_Deidara: Breath you birdbrain! Tobi un!_

_Tobi: Say it!_

_Deidara: Alright then! I kinda sorta maybe you know…_

_*the boy hops up*_

_Tobi: You mean you like me?_

_Deidara: A little un_

_Tobi: You mean it?_

_Deidara: Don't push it_

_(Both)_

_Unision *do a small gig*: Oh, looks like I got me a~ friend~_

* * *

Deidara muttered angrily now that it was over, "I'm going to kill them un!" Tobi laughed, "Tobi thought it was fun sempai! He knew all along you liked him." "Shut up un!"

Back through the portal they went again, not being able to escape the others teasing since they all saw it from a patch of ice not too far away before winding up in….hopefully….their very last location.

*Kakuzu stood atop the tall staircase, confused to what was happening until he saw his lover...transfixed on her. She came down the opposing stairs clad in a satiny golden yellow dress, all fixed up just for him.

Clearing his throat he was compelled to come down to meet her in the middle, not being able to control himself from grinning.

She was smiling lovingly up at him before curtsying as he bowed, taking his arm as they went down the remaining steps.

They couldn't control their movements and waltzed across the ballroom in grace.

"So, I take it this is what you wanted?" She nodded with a blush, "Mmmhmm, I've always wanted to dance like this with an elegant gown with you and Hidan. Like a fairy tale come true."

He actually chuckled, "Well, don't look now but the others are all dancing with us." "I know, this is what me, Lexy, Tobi, and even Deidara wanted; though as for the others I don't know who they ended up with."

Itachi was glad he wasn't wearing a dress but he hummed the tune as his lover swayed him across the floor. "You must like this story if you're actually humming Itachi." The raven nodded and murmured, "Beauty and the Beast is rather a touching story to me."

Kisame smirked, "Are you sure it isn't because it suits us?" "Hmm, maybe. You'll just have to find out." "Oh I will, once we get home."

Sasori was scowling whereas Deidara was grinning from ear to ear. "Why are you leading brat? I'm the oldest and seme." The blonde chuckled, "Maybe it's because I'm taller Danna un." The red head snorted but deep down…he was rather enjoying himself.

* * *

Lexy sighed, still admiring her pink gown from the Little Mermaid as she danced with Kuro. **"I'm curious to why Shiro and I were separated to do this ridiculous thing." **"This is a romance theme and we needed an even number of people you know."

"**Then why aren't you dancing with my other half or Kisame?" **The teen rolled her eyes before being twirled around, "I don't know so just lighten up and go with it alright!"

Tobi and Shiro didn't say much of anything except smile at one another, both enjoying this fairy tale immensely.

Hidan and Madara were glaring daggers and growling at each other. "Why the fuck did I get paired up with you?" "How the hell am I supposed to know? I'd rather be dancing with my niece or Olivia."

"I bet you fucking would." The elder glanced around the room before noticing something important. "Is this some kind of joke?" What?"

"Why are you leading instead of me?" An evil smirk spread across the jashinist's lip and he chuckled smugly, "Simple, you're the fucking chick."

"How so? I'm older and wiser than you." "Doesn't fucking matter, you have long hair." "Deidara has long hair and he's leading!" The priest laughed, "I'm fucking taller bitch!"

"Will you two shut up! You're ruining the damn moment!" Kakuzu smirked at his small lover's outburst before they all finally stopped, Hidan and Madara shuddering and trying to wipe their hands on their pants to get the other's filth off…..like it was that easy.

"So, can we go now un?" "NOT YET!" Hidan ran to Olivia and latched onto her. "I didn't get to fucking dance with my woman!"

The music started again and they all began dancing once more, with a slight few different pairings.

Tobi was with Kuro now, Madara was thrilled to be with Lexy, and Kakuzu was with Shiro. Those two were slightly uncomfortable with it but didn't say anything, they gave their lovers the chance to dance with the other.

Hidan sighed, "Now this is more like it, and fuck…..you're so damn fucking gorgeous babe." She blushed and murmured, "You're very stunning yourself Hidan, both you and Kakuzu."

"Of course we fucking are."Olivia giggled at her lover's smugness but that was one of quirk's he had that was so appealing.

* * *

Lexy smirked at her uncle, who was eyeballing a certain someone across the room.

Grinning evilly the teen muttered, "You love her don't you?" "Who?" "Olivia."

He snorted, "Don't be absurd Lexy. I merely like her and that's it." "Then why ogle her all the time uncle?"

"I admit I'm a bit too flirtatious with her but it's not love I assure you. She….well….awakened sensations in me that I thought was long lost."

Before she could ask him what he meant the music stopped and a rather large portal opened up. "Looks like that's our cue." Itachi nodded and walked with his lover, along with the others to the exit.

*A flash of light blinded them and they stumbled around the room before noticing they were back home.

"YES! We're fucking home!" Hidan plopped onto the couch as Sasori jerked on his lover's arm, "Don't you ever do anything like that again brat!"

"It was for a good reason Danna, but you have to admit you enjoyed flying around un."

The puppet master just smirked a bit….yeah he did like that part. Itachi frowned, "What reason are you referring to?"

Tobi and Deidara glanced at each other, "You mean, none of you know?" Many shook their heads as Madara urged them on, "So, this wasn't just a get away to some magical land?"

Olivia smirked, "That was part of it but there was another reason we did this too." Still in the dark Tobi make everything clear, "So, did Loo-Loo like her day early birthday present from Tobi, Sempai, and Olivia."

Everyone's jaw dropped. "BIRTHDAY!?"

The teen giggled, "I fucking loved my present from you three, you have no damn cue how much I enjoyed it." She then glared at the others, "As for the rest of you I'm really disappointed you guys forgot about my birthday!"

Kisame gapped, "You never told us the date of your birthday!" "I did too!" Kakuzu shook his head, "No you haven't." "Yes I did!"

Hidan scowled, "No you fucking didn't!" Olivia covered her friend's mouth and muttered, "You know, I think they're right." "I don't recall you telling them either un."

The teen furrowed her brows and stood there in deep thought, "Hmmm, I could've sworn….oh well, now you know and I want a damn party and cake!"

Madara rolled his eyes, "Of course you would demand for attention." "That's right uncle and you have to give me an extra special gift since you knew when my birthday was and forgot!"

The elder chuckled, "You're mistaken, I did remember though I'm rather surprised no one else knew and were just acting like they didn't. Anyway, I already have your present."

Those chocolate orbs went wide and she glomped him, "What you get me? What you get me?"

Kakuzu grumbled, "Great, just great. Now I have to find her a damn gift or she won't shut up about it." Olivia laughed and rubbed his shoulder, "It's alright Tarzan; I'll help you look."

He glared at her as Zetsu cleared his throat. **"If anything, I doubt tomorrow will be as bizarre as today was." **"I agree though today was rather lovely."

Kisame groaned, "Some parts were fine but, as long as we don't have to go through that again I'll be happy."

They could only hope…some more than others.

**TBC:**

**Next chapter the last one, review and let me know what you think on this.**

**By the by, if any readers doesn't have any clue what song Deidara and Tobi sung just go to Youtube.**

**Type in: looks like I got me a friend **

**It's 3min & 28sec, it should be the second video down :)**

**It's from the movie the Pebble and the Penguin…I thought it suited Tobi and Deidara lol**


	7. Chapter 7

Itachi put the finishing touches on the cake and then set it on the counter, shooing Zetsu away to keep him from sneaking a taste. **"Come on, just a little nibble." **

"Absolutely not! I spent all afternoon making this." The bipolar man groaned as his friend laughed at him, "You're just going to have to wait until after supper Zetsu."

"I can't wait that long!" Madara smirked, "I'm almost done cooking her favorite meal so stop whining."

Since it was last minute, the majority of the Akatsuki had to go the store early in the morning to get all the ingredients/presents for the birthday girl. Therefore, they couldn't really celebrate until the evening.

Olivia, Deidara, and Tobi took Lexy out for most of the day since she was….well….pestering the others.

* * *

*Itachi almost Tsukyomied her ass for almost making him drop the cake. Kakuzu was annoyed by her following him around, trying to figure out what he got her. Even Kisame was rather vexed because she kept trying to peek into his room while he wrapped her gift.

Olivia had scolded her angrily, "I know it's your birthday but stop trying to sneak peeks and aggravate them Lexy! They don't have to do this you know so if you don't knock it off they no doubt will call the whole thing off! Do you want that?"

The teen shrank down and pouted, feeling guilty that she made her friend so upset. "I didn't mean to but I'm just excited. I never had a real party before."

The woman huffed and crossed her arms, "I can understand that but that doesn't mean for you to piss them off! How do you think Kisame would feel if you saw the present he got you before he could even give it to you?"

Lexy shrank even more mumbling, "I'm sorry." "Apologize to the ones you annoyed and then we'll go to the lake." Gloomily the teen did and actually felt better once it was over….until they came back.

She was beyond giddy then.

* * *

*Madara announced the food was done and the teen squealed at the menu, "SHRIMP TERIYAKI! MY FAVORITE!" Wolfing down the food, the teen giggled and stared questionably at the elder, "I didn't know you could cook this well Madara."

He chuckled, "I haven't been around this long for nothing you know. Kakuzu can cook exceptionally well too." Olivia stared at her lover bewildered, "Really? I never knew that." Hidan was gawking too, "Is that fucking true?"

The miser grumbled, "Yeah so?" "Then why the fuck haven't I seen you cook? You're never in the kitchen!" Olivia scowled, "Let me guess, there was no need to since I came into the picture."

He shook his head, "No it's not that, the fact that I'm actually a gourmet cook is beside the point. I rather do the cooking instead of ordering food all the time to save money; besides, I have cooked for you two before but didn't tell you."

Hidan fixed him another plate, "I thought I fucking knew everything about you and this fucking comes up. Oh well, I got fed either way." The woman giggled, "That explains all those mysterious dinners we assumed he bought when he said he got them on sale."

Lexy nodded, "Pretty clever but you shouldn't hide it. Cooking is a talent, isn't that right Dei?" "I would think so, one can get rather artistic with food un." Even Sasori agreed on that.

The dinner went by rather nicely, if one didn't know any better, these criminals looked like one big happy family. Zetsu served the cake after Lexy blew out the candle and worshiped Itachi's feet on the masterpiece in the mean time.

Itachi was swelling with pride at the compliments and smiled softly. Once they were through they went to the living room with Lexy hopping around, "Presents! Presents!"

Tobi was doing it too, for what reason they didn't know, but it was funny. Zetsu and Hidan ate too much and were sprawled out on the loveseat clutching their beyond full stomach's.

* * *

Madara handed her his gift first, "Happy Birthday." She eagerly tore the wrapping off and went, "Ooooh!"

It was a necklace with a brown gemstone charm on the end with a golden slit in the middle. Sasori leaned over to see, "It resembles a cat's eye."

Madara nodded, "It is in fact a cat's eye gemstone. I got the brown since it matched her eyes." Lexy put it on with a goofy grin as Tobi giggled like crazy.

"The gem is practically in Loo-Loo's cleavage!" "No complaints here." Madara sent the shark a small glare but returned the hug his adoptive niece attacked him with. "I LOVE IT!"

"Good and make sure you take care of it." "Don't worry I will." Sasori handed her his gift, "Here." She went wide eyed and simply stared into the box, "Really?"

"What is it un?" She pulled out a strap on dildo with a lustful grin. Kakuzu frowned, "Seriously?"

Lexy bit her lip in excitement, mostly from all the dirty images going through her mind on what she could do with it until she noticed something, "Hey…no fair." "What?"

She scowled at the red head, "This is the same one you already had." "So, I have no use for it so that's why I'm giving it to you."

Not sure whether to be grateful or not she just shrugged, "Thank you and don't worry, I'll be using it." Hearing that, Kakuzu jerked his lover onto his lap, possessively wrapping an arm around her waist.

* * *

Seeing that reaction the teen giggled and went to the next gift before she said something she'd regret. Kisame smirked and handed her his gift, squealing when she opened it. "I've always wanted an ipod!"

Madara had to pull her off the shark, not liking the fact she was kissing him like no tomorrow. "YOU'RE THE BEST KISAME."

"That's also from Itachi too." Kissing the raven next and thanking him, Zetsu tossed her his. "Interesting."

It was a black, low-cut halter top. **"Let me know if I got the right size." **"Do you like it?" "Of course I do, thanks!"

Without even looking Hidan threw his gift to her, "Happy fucking birthday." He didn't say it in a mean way just…..he couldn't care less at the moment.

Olivia tried to go to him but the miser refused to release her. Admitting defeat she sighed, "Does your stomach hurt now Hidan?" He nodded with a groan, "Too much fucking cake."

Sasori left and came back with a pill and glass of water. "Take this." The priest did with a pout and glanced over at Lexy, "Did you open the fucking box yet?"

A smirk indicated that she did, tsking him while showing it off, "I was not expecting this kind of gift..at least not from you." The woman gawked, "Hidan!" "What? It fucking made me think of her!"

It was a pair of frilly panties that said 'boobilicious' on the back. "Shouldn't that be printed on a bra un." "Tobi likes it!" **"She does have big breasts so it works."**

* * *

Blushing, the teen put the gift up and then stared at the last person to give her something…..for some odd reason she'd been dying to know his the most.

The miser and teen started a staring contest until his lover nudged him. "Go on, give her the gift." He grunted and pulled a small box from his sleeve and handed it to her.

Hidan smirked, "I've got to fucking see what you got her old man since Olivia couldn't go with you."

Warily, Lexy opened it and when she did, she growled, "What the fuck is this?"

Kakuzu grinned evilly as she revealed his gift…..a teething ring.

"This is for babies!"

He chuckled, "Thus why I got it for you and since you love to bite so much, maybe now you'll use that instead of other people." He looked down at his lover when he uttered the last part.

Lexy wasn't happy with it and groaned but Tobi giggled, "You can stick it in the fridge to cool it Loo-Loo." Madara found this just as humorous as the miser did. "What's so funny?"

"That thing is rather….appropriate for you." "AGH! Not you too!"

Itachi mumbled, "At any rate that's all the gifts." "Oh right, thanks everyone. This is the best birthday ever."

Hidan crawled off the couch and headed to his room to get over his stomach ache. Kisame whispered something to Lexy and she left with him, telling the others she'd be right back.

Tobi whined as he brought out an empty bottle, "Ok but hurry up! Tobi ready to play spin the bottle." The rest of the group were content with the game and started without the rest.

* * *

*Lexy bounced into the shark's room, "What extra present do I get huh?" "You'll see, hang on." Going through a box he pulled out a bottle of oil and spread a clean sheet over his bed.

"Now undress and lie face down." The teen, thinking naughtily, did as was told; very eager to what he was going to do. However, it wasn't what she expected.

Moaning softly, a pair of strong hands rubbed the oil onto her back and already could hear a few pops and cracks. "Ooooh that feels good."

A massage really suited her just fine but she went wide eyed when another pair was applying pressure to her calf's.

Lifting and turning her head slightly there was another man. "Itachi?" The raven smirked and just proceeded giving the massage, switching with his lover after a few minutes.

Kisame flipped Lexy over on her back and all four hands began to do their thing again. The teen purred like a happy kitten, loving the aches and pains that were going away until a particular moan escaped from a certain action.

The hands had moved to her breasts, not only massaging but fondling the sensitive buds as well. "Like that don't you?" A loud purr was the response as the shark crawled on top of the teen, attacking the nipple with his teeth and suckling on it.

The raven kept fondling the free one, smirking as he too flicked his tongue on the perky nipple. It wasn't long before Lexy growled impatiently to go further.

Chuckling, the men stripped their clothes off and attacked. Forcing her to straddle him, Kisame entered with a powerful thrust, muffling her cry with his mouth as Itachi roughly pushed her down so he could prepare her.

* * *

Growling and moaning at the same time, the teen wasn't sure which was better: the length pumping in and out of her, the hot delicious tongue in her ass, or the fact she was still getting a breast massage.

The entire thing was pure bliss. "Get ready birthday girl." Itachi rammed inside her anally, once again she groaned and muffled a cry of pain but it soon became nothing but moans. They knew she liked it rough and wanted to please her…just not going overboard of course.

"Harder! Fuck me harder!" Kisame smirked as did Itachi and they both thrusted as hard as they could go, making the teen cling to the shark and more or less scream from the wonderful sensations she was feeling. It was too much!

Dominating the teen's mouth again, they both growled when they came followed by the raven with a soft moan.

Pulling out gently Itachi stroked her back before crawling into the bed. Kisame wrapped his arms around both of them with a chuckle and used her breasts as a pillow.

"Now...it's the best….birthday…ever!"

*In the other room the spin the bottle game grew out of hand. Kakuzu refused to kiss Madara and when Olivia took her turn it landed on the elder but her lover wouldn't allow it.

So in the end, Kakuzu started making out with his lover, joined by the blonde and red head. Zetsu had attacked Tobi and then beckoned the sulking Madara over, "There's room for you too." **"It is a special occasion after all."**

Disney adventure's followed by a birthday celebration with smut…..it doesn't get any better than this.

**FINI!**

**HAPPY BIRTHDAY LEXY!**


End file.
